A plan so cunning, you could put a tail on it and call it a weasel.
Posted by Possum Comitatus on January 31, 2008
With apropos to Judge Growler of Greeensborough for inspiring the Baldrick headline.
Karl Rove it ain’t but Rove McManus it just might be. Over at The Australian, Little Miss Maiden has uncovered one of the funniest things you’ll see for a long, long time. They’re a couple of documents, maybe extracts, of some “strategic advice” that’s been circulating through the Liberal ranks (you can download the documents from The Oz article).
The advice was produced by Don D’Cruz, once part of the IPA set – but the less said about him the better. I’m sure he’s wishing the less said about him the better right about now.
Anyways, the spiel basically goes that the Libs believe that abolishing Workchoices will lead to a breakout of wage inflation (which would flow through to higher interest rates etc etc), that to win the political battle the Libs should not only support abolishing Workchoices, but push Rudd to fast track it, to make him do it quicker than he ordinarily would – that way, shit will hit the fan before the next election allowing the Libs to waltz back into power blowing a big “I told youse so” raspberry to the electorate over economic management.
It also involves the Libs engaging with the labour movement so they can run political insurgency operations aimed at creating unrest at the lower levels of the union movement, extorting businesses over IR reform to receive greater campaign donations and a whole lot of horsefluff about taking the moral high ground.
Yeah yeah, I know – it really is as loopy as it sounds. But it also sounds like it’s not particularly original either, resembling some strange operationalised strategic fantasy based on this IPA document (thanks to Mark from LP).
Apparently Spanky Nelson and Aquaman can easily make a public backflip from dying in a ditch supporting Workchoices less than 70 days ago, to not only completely agreeing with its removal, but demanding that Rudd abolish it in a time frame far, far quicker than Rudd has planned!
And apparently nearly all of this can be achieved this year, and apparently the public wont go “WTF – Who put the crack in the orange juice?” because they will be in pure awe of Nelson standing up for fairness… or something.
One of the funniest parts of the comic strip was where the union movement was described :
“The new generation union leaders (including those in Parliament), are highly educated, experienced, business savvy deal-makers of equal capacity to top business operators in Australia.”
But then the “advice” goes on to assume that these same “highly educated, experienced, business savvy deal-makers of equal capacity to top business operators in Australia” will go and act like complete lunatics by making unsustainable wage claims, start bickering with the Labor Party, will tie up the ALP in internal shitfights – and all through little more than the charismatic power of Brendan Nelsons hair… oh, and a few quips about the need for fairness and taking the moral high ground.
But the truly funny thing is the document assumes that anyone will be paying any attention to anything that the Liberal Party has to say for the next few years. That really is stand up comedian stuff.
The documents provide a veritable shooting gallery of political naivety, and there is such a large quantity of nonsense contained in the “advice” that it’s hard to know just where to begin, let alone to stop when it comes to pointing out its plentiful inanities – it’s no wonder that some Libs leaked it to the media. It’s certainly an effective way to kill off any potential outbreak of derangement that might occur in the Liberal party should some parts of it, in their desperation, start taking this horseshit seriously.
The best piece of advice D’Cruz could have given the Liberal Party is to stop listening to their ever tightening incestuous circle of apparatchiks when it comes to advice in the first place – but that’s another story.
Go and have a read of the documents, then decide whether you should laugh or cry.